Upon casting a critical eye on my self, one observation ends up being of particular interest every time. The positively profound characteristics of my personality were formed by some of the darkest points of my life. I always find strange beauty in this contradiction.
What’s so beautiful about it?
The beauty of this contrast lies in the way it makes me feel so close to nature, keeps me grounded. It somehow strikes me as one law which binds the entire existence together – a divine way of assuring that it is all under control. ‘Don’t worry, just breathe. It will all be okay.’ Isn’t even the slightest occurrence of this thought so soothing?
Would you like to take a walk with me? Come. Ignore the noise, just listen to your heart beat and look around you. Observe. How does it feel? Do you feel the slight chill of air brushing your face? Feels nice, doesn’t it? Absorb. Birds look happier today. I wonder what the sky is thinking right now, looking down at us as we walk wearing our smiles. Assigning the best of everything to us, I am sure!
Probably it did not feel as good the last time you came out. Perhaps it was not the best of your days. I remember mine wasn’t. I was tired. My shoulders felt unfairly burdened. Nothing looked right. It was just yesterday. I was bogged down by the uncertainty of life – human, after all. But look, that was just yesterday. That gloomy sun went down and came out all fresh and shining today. What exactly did change in between? Nothing actually. Just that the night fell but this new day washed it away. A low simply followed by a high. Dark followed by light, that too a brighter one.
We should take these walks more often. Together with ourselves; listening to our hearts. Salvaging ourselves from the darker depths. I call it a ‘return to nature’ walk.
Do nothing and stay stuck in this rut, shall we?
I know. That’s how it seems, right? Breaking badly one night and waking up the next day as a satisfied conformist at best? We should fight and push back hard. Should reach out and snatch what we think is best for us. Well, not really. For this path shall only tire us till we drop dead. Befriending the divine scheme of things, on the other hand, empowers us. It is never meant to keep us from reaching out for more. In fact, it leaves one with the most enabling feeling.
Think of it this way. A seasoned MMA fighter never enters the ring all hyped up. He would rarely be seen jumping around and throwing away his jabs earlier on in the game. He will be seen as the calmer of the two, the one in control, more composed. He takes his time to sync himself with the opponent – befriends him – and only uses perfect blows every time the opponent falters in maintaining the guard. I would never call him as someone stuck in the rut. Would you?
In fact, he maintains focus and learns throughout the fight. Every fall he takes lifts him back up with greater self-awareness and resolve – he resurrects as an improved version of himself.
Observe. Absorb. Be patient. Emerge stronger.
Falls are bound to come our way. Nothing stays the same forever. For if it did, we would have nothing to aspire for. Accurate flapping of wings would never occur to a hatchling if it were not to hit the ground trying a couple of times.
We all oscillate between the bright and gloom. Do not let it bother you. Ms. Time is a lovely little playful lady. She loves to change and show off. Admire her in all her personas. Love her. Respect her so she may leave you wiser at every turn. After all, winners are not made in utter bliss.
Remember, the beating pulse is what keeps the blood running in our veins. Static pulse only indicates a soul that is no more.